Today is a new day and I'm feeling great!!! Not much longer and Jana and Andrew will be here. I'm so excited! Matthew is so vocal now and he does the neatest things. He really is growing up.
PT is coming along and I am now working on bending my knee 60 degrees...instead of the 30 degrees I was allowed after surgery. I wonder when the tightness will go away. I'll be running by the end of this year...I just know it!!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Started my own little blog
Since I started a family blog I thought I would start one for just myself. I figure no one will read this anyways but I might feel better about some things if I send them out into what feels like the infinite abyss of nothingness instead of my private little journal...well maybe in addition to.
I think about D nearly every day. I wonder how he would have played with M. My mind wanders constantly and sometimes for just a second it feels like he's here. 5 years old and about to run down the hallway to tell me something exciting that just happened. I know, I know...probably not the healthiest thing and I'm sure other Moms who have a significant loss don't feel like this but I think my very active imagination plays a big role. Time is supposed to heal all wounds but I think this one may have become infected when I was 19 and will never really heal properly. Giving my life to God helps tremendously. I only wish I had not taken that hiatus from age 17-22. I came back and like only our Savior can do He has taken me lovingly back into his arms. Like crawling into bed with my Me-maw after Pe-paw went to work at 5 am....the warmth and familiarity envelopes me and I just know everything will work out because He has planned it so and so it will be. Hmmmm I wonder what people will think...but then I ought to not care nearly so much. I have all I need.
Matthew 5:4
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
I think about D nearly every day. I wonder how he would have played with M. My mind wanders constantly and sometimes for just a second it feels like he's here. 5 years old and about to run down the hallway to tell me something exciting that just happened. I know, I know...probably not the healthiest thing and I'm sure other Moms who have a significant loss don't feel like this but I think my very active imagination plays a big role. Time is supposed to heal all wounds but I think this one may have become infected when I was 19 and will never really heal properly. Giving my life to God helps tremendously. I only wish I had not taken that hiatus from age 17-22. I came back and like only our Savior can do He has taken me lovingly back into his arms. Like crawling into bed with my Me-maw after Pe-paw went to work at 5 am....the warmth and familiarity envelopes me and I just know everything will work out because He has planned it so and so it will be. Hmmmm I wonder what people will think...but then I ought to not care nearly so much. I have all I need.
Matthew 5:4
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
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